What the heck is this site all about?
The community I’m growing here is all about loving your body in whatever shape it is in right now, and not waiting until you get to an ideal shape or number to be happy.
If you want to get a toned shaped (I do!) or lose weight, go for it. But don’t think for a moment that when you obtain that toned shape or special number on the scale it’ll make you happy or change your life.
It won’t. You will still be you. The change has to come from inside.
I know it’s hard to believe that with the media reminding you every moment that you don’t look like models in the magazines or the celebrities on TV that display having a certain look is the only way to have a happy life. This is false.
And if you are sick and tired of this fallacy and just want to eat the damn cake without stressing about your weight, and still love your body…you are in the right place.
About the Empress
So, you want to know more about me before you hire me to coach you or speak to your group or believe anything I’ve written on these pages? Yeah, I get that. I do the same thing when I visit someone’s page.
So we can get it out the way, I got my coaching certification from the Institute of Professional Excellence and Coaching, and am a speaker and storyteller. You can click here to read testimonials from past clients, or here to see where I have spoken, and watch a video of a recent talk I gave.
But I’m guessing what you really want to find out here is if I understand where you are, what you are going through, and if I can help you? Because at the end of the day, credentials are cute but you want results.
I never had a problem with my body until I had to stop going to the gym because of a torn Achilles tendon. When I got the all clear to start working out I felt ginormous (combination of gigantic and enormous, get it?).
I became extremely body conscious and obsessed over my weight and how people must have thought I’d really let myself go until one day I asked myself a very important question: Who cares? No, really. Who is really looking over my shoulder when I weigh myself? Who is taking notes of what I eat and what size label is on my clothing?
I was so annoyed at myself for getting swept up in the fat talk/body shaming hype, and ultimately falling out of love with myself. It sucked! I just wanted to love my body again without freaking out over what I ate or what workout I skipped. I didn’t want to have to rely on outside forces to love myself or wait until I reached a certain body type or number on the scale before I deemed myself worthy of love and happiness.
My first step was to stop weighing myself. It was driving me batty! If my weight was down I was ecstatic. If my weight went up or stayed the same, I was pissed, especially if I felt I worked hard that week.
It’s ridiculous to allow an inanimate object to dictate your mood so I opted out of that crazy cycle.
Now, I go by the way my clothes fit. Don’t get me wrong I have freaked out when my clothes got tighter but that’s mostly because I’d have to go clothes shopping and I HATE shopping. I also really like the clothes I have.
My second step was to really look at myself and ask: If I wasn’t buying into the hype and stopped trying to compare myself to strangers, how would I feel about the way I looked?
My answer: Pretty damn good! In fact, I’m really cute.
It was that realization that put me back on track of falling back in love with myself. And now, I know no matter what size I am it’ll never mean I’m not sexy, beautiful or undeserving of happiness.
And I sincerely want that for you.
My Love Letter to You
You, my love, completely deserve to be loved exactly as you are for exactly who you are. I don’t care what you have done in the past or how nuts, imperfect or flawed you believe you are. You don’t ever have to change in order for me to accept you so never ever change for someone else to accept you. You are beautiful, just the way you are, flaws and all. Everyone (friends, family, lovers, strangers) is lucky to have you bless them with your presence in their life, no matter how brief, and they better damn well recognize it. And if they don’t, you don’t need them in your life.
Don’t ever disguise your talents, feel guilty or be ashamed for the stellar, amazing, beautiful, genius of a woman you are. You are already the total package so stop looking for someone else to complete you because it’s impossible. There is nothing outside of you that is missing or you need to be completed. You already have everything you need inside of you, whether you believe it or not.
You, my love, completely deserve to be loved exactly as you are for exactly who you are and the person’s love and understanding you deserve the most, is yours!
And it is my hope that by sticking around these parts, you learn to give that to yourself.